Sunday, October 24, 2010

Wedded bliss

    In just a few days Tim and I will celebrate our 14th anniversary.  On our wedding day, 14 years ago we were young and in love and very idealistic.  We had no idea what our life would be but we knew we would face it all together.  If you would have asked me then I probably would have told you that by this point in our marriage we would have worked out all the kinks and just be coasting along in wedded bliss.  And, of course, after all this time we surely have worked out all those newlywed issues.  The toilet paper goes on with the paper rolling over the top and we both remember to put the cap back on the toothpaste.  We certainly know each other’s little habits well enough that there should be nothing to fight about anymore.  And yet….if I have learned nothing else in the last 14 years I have at least learned that relationships can never be put on autopilot.  Marriage is never something to just coast along in. 
    As a married couple, everyday Tim and I must wake up and decide to be committed to each other and our life together.  And being committed means so much more than just wearing our rings and living in the same house.  We have to be committed to thinking of each other’s needs, caring about each other’s feelings, supporting each other in everything we do.  It truly is a daily choice.  We have had days in our marriage where it has been so easy, when we feel close to one another and are enjoying life together and things are fun.  But, of course, there have been days when it isn’t so easy too.  When we have gotten on each other’s nerves, annoyed each other and even angered each other to the point that it is hard to be in the same room.  Yet, we keep choosing, even on the hard days, to love each other.  And just like our family, over the years our love has grown. 
    It was 14 years ago that I married Tim- my husband, my soul mate, my best friend.  And though it has not been all easy, all fun, and all wedded bliss, we have faced it all together.
    This year, as a tribute to where the last 14 years have taken us, we will celebrate our anniversary at our son’s cub scout pack meeting.  I suppose that is appropriate, it is the perfect reminder that marriage is not always a pretty picture of romance and excitement.  Marriage is a whole lot of ordinary things, paying bills, taking out the trash, cleaning up after the kids, trying to find a few minutes for adult conversation then finding we have nothing to talk about except for the bills and the kids.  But it is beautiful and sacramental just the same and I feel so very blessed to share it all with the love of my life.

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