A few weeks ago, I was sitting around with some friends just chatting about our kids and home schooling and how to live a life pleasing to God, when the subject of modesty came up. One of my friends had been told that wearing jeans was immodest and inappropriate and she wanted our opinions on the matter. I have to say the whole conversation was quite eye-opening for me. I had just never heard or considered that jeans were at all revealing, or at all inappropriate. I wasn’t even sure I understood what the problem could possibly be. One of my other friends who was there, explained that some people believe jeans “show off everything”. That because they are close fitting, blue jeans leave little to the imagination, revealing the shapes of our bodies to all the world. She said there are many women she knows who will only wear skirts and dresses, because they consider them much more modest. I, too, know women who wear only skirts and dresses. I was aware it had something to do with modesty, I suppose, but I never gave it a lot of thought. I have to admit that what thoughts I had had were that some of these women (though certainly not all) tended to choose frumpy unflattering long skirts and seemed to have “let themselves go”. It did make sense though, when she went on to further explain that skirts and dresses were also more authentically feminine than jeans or pants.
As I mentioned this conversation took place quite a few weeks ago. Between the four of us present, there were varying opinions on the matter but the general consensus was that whether one wore jeans or not, was not really a huge issue of morality, despite what some might think. Nevertheless, I have not been able to get the conversation out of my mind. I look into my closet much more critically lately, and have driven my poor husband crazy asking over and over, “Do you think this outfit is inappropriate?” I still wear my beloved jeans many days but I always feel a little less comfortable in them.
In my agonizing over the subject these last few weeks, I have come to a few conclusions….
- First, my jeans probably are a little more revealing than I originally realized. They do accentuate curves and hug tightly in certain areas.
- Second, jeans, and pants in general, are not very feminine, while skirts and dresses, obviously are. Skirts and dresses are pretty, they are girly, they are softer- both in their feel and in their look.
- Third, I actually enjoy dressing nicer sometimes. I am just as comfortable in dresses and skirts, as I am in my jeans and I feel better about myself in many ways when I dress more feminine. I feel prettier and more positive.
- Jeans may show off our shapes, but in relation to many fashions out there these days, they are harmless. I dress to blend in and not to stand out and, really, in my jeans and tee-shirts I’m sure I attract a lot less attention than in my skirts.
- I am pretty sure I have not led any man to sin by going out (with my five kids) in a pair of jeans, no matter how tight they may fit. Not, when the road to the library or grocery store or shopping mall is lined with billboard after billboard of almost-naked women advertising plastic surgery or body wash. And the woman standing in front of me in line is likely wearing a low cut shirt and super short shorts.
- I do want to look nice everyday. I want to look nice for myself, but most of all, for my husband. He, too (unfortunately) is seeing the fashions of the day and I would hate for him to come home to find me dressed in a muu-muu and cease to find me attractive. It would not be fair to him to let myself go.